Articles of the Month

Should  single  Catholics  be worried  about marriage?  What can  single  Catholics  do  with their  lives?

     This is a great question and I'm sure many single Catholics have wrestled over this question more than once in their lives?  The answer is:  no.  Marriage is a big step and more and more people are choosing to wait longer to get married due to finances, wanting to become stable in their career, wanting to travel, etc.  The divorce rate is now, on average, about 50% of all marriages end in divorce.  That is a tragedy.  This is a far cry from when about 85% of the American population, during the 1950's, got married and the majority of marriages lasted.  Happiness in marriage is still possible but it takes alot of work, both people should be able to compromise, each Catholic partner must remain good Catholics thoughout their marriage, be willing to also take an active role in bringing their children up in the Catholic faith and keep God, Our Lord Jesus and Our Blessed Mother as the #1 priority in their lives.  Otherwise, marriages just do not seem to work.
     Sometimes, it just takes time to find someone that is compatible and is also a good Catholic.  When single Catholics are actively looking for potential marriage partners, it is important that they do not make the terrible mistake of foregoing their chastity while they are dating or entering into the engagement period.   The temptation to live up to this over-sexualized, modern society is sometimes great but it is important that single Catholics do not relent and give into this temptation.  Many non-Church-going people have admitted that they do not think about chastity while they are dating and that is a scary prospect.  Single Catholics should set themselves apart as individuals who follow their faith and therefore, also regard their chastity and devotion to God as the most important aspect of their lives. 
     If single Catholics are worrying about getting married in order to have children, they must pray to Our Lord everyday and ask Him to send a good and faithful Catholic into their lives who also believes in all of the teachings of the Catholic Church.   Single Catholics can find other traditional, single Catholics at Church dances, Catholic single's groups, at single Catholic conferences, yearly Catholic conferences in their area, on pilgrimage tours, etc.  Single Catholics must wait to find other good traditional Catholic friends first and perhaps these friendships will blossom into marriages.  One thing that single Catholics should not do is try to find a potential marriage partner or future boyfriend/girlfriend at a single's bar or nightclub.  These are the worse places to look for potential life-long wives/husbands or boyfriends/girlfriends and single Catholics should try to stay away from these types of environments.   It can be assumed that most people in these places just want to "pick up and use" singles and most people that go there do not have the same moral ideals that traditional, church-going Catholics have. 
     On the other hand, there are other single Catholics that may have chosen the single life permanently.  It may be their calling.  Some single Catholics have chosen to give up the idea of getting married and having children in order to pursue a missionary life or a life dedicated to the Lord as a Catholic Consecrated virgin, www.ConsecratedVirgins.org, as a Third Order member of a religious order or to serve the Church in their own way.  There were many saints who were Third Order members of religious orders who still lived in the world.  One example of this was St. Catherine of Siena who was a tertiary of the Dominican Order.  She is an important example of a Catholic lay person who became a saint.  Another example of a single Catholic is Blessed Pier Giorgio Frassati, www.FrassatiUSA.org,  who also belonged to the Third Order of St. Dominic.  Other single Catholics choose to head Catholic organizations or start their own Catholic organizations.  Many single Catholics have also chosen to adopt children on their own, although this may be financially difficult and it may also be difficult for the children since they would be living in a single parent environment. 
    And, there are some single Catholics that choose to become priests, brothers, deacons and religious sisters.  This is a very blessed and holy vocation for single Catholics who wish to permanently give their life to God and to the Church.  There are many seminaries and religious orders that men and women can call to find out about to eventually become priests and sisters.  For example, there are the Diocesan priests (www.TheCatholicPriestToday.com) that live in the rectories next to parishes, religious communities that priests and brothers can live in community such as the Jesuits, Franciscans, Dominicans, Benedictines, etc., Deacons (www.CatholicDeacon.org) which get religious instruction from the Archdiocese and religious sister or nuns which come from a variety of orders.  You can go to www.vocation.com and read more about discernment of the various vocations of life.
     There are many options for single Catholics today.  Single Catholics, whatever they choose to do with their lives, should always keep God, Jesus and Our Blessed Mother as the first priority in their lives no matter what they do and no matter what others may say.  Their own soul should be their concern and where their soul will go after this life is over.  God may have a plan for your life so don't get down on yourself if your not married right now, don't have a boyfriend/girlfriend or don't know what to do with your life.  God may want you to get closer to Him first and put Him as the most important person in your life before you think about your ultimate decisions. 

What  should  we  be  learning from  this  Lenten  Season?
 

     Most people go through Lent and Holy Week not really knowing what they should be learning from the whole experience.  For some single Catholics, they could really care less what happens during this time as long as the Mass doesn't take up too much time.  In some Catholic churches, single Catholics do not even bother to go to Mass at all.  It seems as though singles are going less and less to Church these days.  When you look at the congregation in some churches, the majority of people who go to Mass are the older population of people and married people with their children.  Where are all of the single Catholics? 
     What single Catholics seem to forget is the most important fact and that is that Christ died for our sins--not only for that person's sins but for all of our sins as well!  Without Jesus, we are nothing.  Recently, on an EWTN program called Women of Grace, they had a whole week presentation on the Shroud of Turin.  In summary, the scientists who studied and tested the Shroud to find out the authenticity of it, found that the man who was covered with this Shroud must have suffered such excruciating and tormenting pain due to the lacerations caused by the scourging, crowning of thorns and the lance driven into his side.  The Church has not yet officially announced that this Shroud is the Shroud of Our Lord Jesus Christ but it nevertheless bears witness to the horrendous facts of a crucifixion which could not, in my opinion, have been experienced by anyone else.  
     What that program showed me was that Jesus, who underwent such torments for the world, must love all of humanity with a love that no one can ever imagine.  Yet, what do people give to Jesus in return for His sacrifice?  The very fact that some single people do not even try to lead a holy life, or even bother going to Church for only an hour every week, not even for their own sake, boggles the mind.  It is a terrible testament to the fact that there are few single Catholics following their Catholic faith or are even thinking of Our Heavenly Father or Jesus in their lives.  Single Catholics, especially in the U.S., need to wake up soon, before it will be too late for them.  They need to remember that they should start living holy lives, not a life corrupted by the secularization that is around them.  This life is nothing in comparison with the next world--a world that is eternal, forever.  This life is but a grain of sand in comparison with a sea of sand.  Single Catholics, in fact all Catholics, should now be thinking of their eternal home and hopefully that will be in Heaven--if people confess their sins and change their lives totally, once and for all, toward God and Our Lord Jesus Christ.
     Some single Catholics may be saying to themselves, "Well, I can't go to Mass because I've committed serious sins and God won't forgive me" or "I'd rather watch the football game.  Mass is so boring."  My questions are these:  "What is your life worth to you?  Do you want to go to Hell where your soul will be lost forever?"  As Jesus said, "What good is it if you gain the whole world and lose your soul in the meantime?"  There is nothing on this earth that is worth losing your soul over--not money, possessions, media, bad habits, partying, football games, friends, etc.--absolutely nothing!  People have their priorities in the wrong place.  They should be thinking about God and Our Lord Jesus Christ first, then Our Blessed Mother next, then family, and then our lives, not the other way around.   For those single Catholics who think that their sins are so unforgiveable that God or Our Lord Jesus could never forgive them is utter nonsense and an excuse.  People should know that Jesus is always ready with open arms toward all people who are willing to come to Him with their sins, ready to go to a priest to make a sincere confession and a willingness to change their lives to follow Jesus forever. 
     Following Jesus should be a lifetime commitment, not just for a little time until something better comes along.  Singles should also remember that their bodies and minds are to remain holy at all times as well.  Our bodies are the temples of the Holy Spirit.  Single people cannot afford to be giving their bodies to anyone and everyone that seems to come along their path, as so many do nowadays.  All people will be judged by the actions that they do in this world.  People should never forget that.  Our Blessed Mother said that most souls go to Hell over sins of the flesh than any other sins.  People should have respect for themselves and for others who come their way--that is what it means to love one's neighbor as themselves.
     It is urgent that single Catholics seriously think about their lives now, not tomorrow!  Let single Catholics fill the churches once again, with the determination that they will forever live for Christ who is Our Savior.  Let Him be proud of single Catholics around the world!   It is our prayer that all single Catholics will acknowledge that they cannot live without Our Almighty Father, Our Lord Jesus, Our Blessed Mother, the Angels and the Saints.   Let us all make a promise to ourselves and that is that we will all go to Heaven at the end of our lives.  May God forgive all single Catholics and have mercy on our souls.  May all single Catholics return to Confession monthly, the Mass and Holy Communion weekly, from now on.  May God bless single Catholics and their families, now and always.